Ruminations are our Catalyst
by Quill Maiden
Summary: Love doesn't always treat you fairly. Kat and Patrick are DEFINITELY in love but is that actually enough? Let's just say private thoughts and arguements aren't exactly helping.


Disclaimer: I don't own it and, therefore, shall not claim to.  
  
Note: Okay, so, how many of you fan girls HAVEN'T had 'those thoughts' about Heath Ledger? *looks around* Anyone? *the crickets chirp* Just as I suspected. Understand: this story was though out completely in one of those I-haven't-had-enough-sugar-and-I've-done-too-much-algebra-homework kinds of moods. I'm sure you know what I'm talking about and if not . . . I don't recommend it. However, this DID come from that. Understand, this is a free sample but if you want more of this or you simply want it taken down so that it no longer takes up space on this site then please review and tell me so in the nicest way possible.  
  
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Ruminations are our Catalyst  
  
Patrick sat on the rail of Kat's front porch with his forefinger resting on his lips, staring at the door in deep thought. On the other side of the door, probably sprawled out on a couch in the living room, was a very angry and frustrated Kat. Now had this been Kat's homophone - the domestic housecat - then, sure, he'd be in for some nasty scratches on his arm but that would be nothing compared to the dilemma he was in now. Now, he was wagering with his heart. He and Kat HAD been calmly discussing the college she was heading off for when in what seemed sudden to hindsight they were screaming at each other and . . . a lot of things were said that HOPEFULLY neither of them meant. They hadn't had a fight like this since they'd resolved the Being-paid-to-date-Kat shenanigan. This was NOT good. They'd gotten so far and done so well. How could such a small matter have exploded and inflated so thoroughly?  
  
The door opened and shut as Kat came back out, her eyes slightly red and puffy. That hurt as much as anything she'd said to him. Well, it hurt almost as much. She sniffed and leaned against the house, staring at him moodily. He just stared back, his face evincing no emotion. The fact of the matter was, every horrible thing they'd said to each other hadn't been a spurt of the moment insult. Every last sentence had formed itself in their mind and asserted itself as a thought they'd definitely mulled over in their more unhappy moods. Thoughts were dreadful little things when they remained thoughts, but they were downright evil when they became words.  
  
"So what now?" Kat asked quietly.  
  
"Look, Kat, I'm sorry-"  
  
"No, just think about it. I mean . . . maybe we didn't have to scream it like we did but . . . do you even think this can really last? Living on love is a lie." Her eyes averted.  
  
He slid off the rail and walked over to Kat and turned her face to his. She stared back at him looking strong and sad at the same time. Brave, brave Kat, standing strong in the face of love.  
  
"You don't really mean that."  
  
"Yes," she pushed his hand away. "I do. I mean, think about it. We can't rationally keep this up once the semester starts."  
  
"Look, Kat. We can figure this out. I'm sure of it."  
  
"No, you know what? No. I'm tired of this. We just keep going in circles. This couldn't last and if we hadn't been so . . . so-"  
  
"Madly, terribly in love?" He suggested.  
  
"Yes, in love." She said almost grudgingly, looking away then looking back. "Then we would have seen it in the first place. It never could have worked. We were acting like idiots."  
  
"The phrase is 'fools in love', actually," He shot back angrily. "I don't know why you won't accept that there's nothing wrong with this - with us! Honestly, what's wrong with you? Are you just afraid that maybe, just maybe, we'll actually make it? Are you afraid of being completely head-over- heels for me for once?"  
  
"Yes! Okay? Yes!!!" She turned on him, her temper rising. "I am afraid, Okay? I can't stand the thought of being so helpless. I just . . . I CAN'T DO THIS!!!" She turned to flee back into her house.  
  
"No! You can't run from this Kat." He said, grabbing her by her arm and stopping her in her tracks. "What are you going to do? What are WE going to do?"  
  
The tears were starting to come freely and she attempted to turn and then looked back at him, her free hand fluttering between her eyes and her mouth. "I don't know what I'm going to do but we . . . WE are not doing anything. Patrick . . . consider us broken up."  
  
She struggled in his grasp and this time he let go. She opened the door and ran into the house, letting the door slam behind her. He stood there for a moment, in shock. Then he turned around and muttered a curse, kicking a flower pot a good ten feet away. He ran a hand through his hair and turned back towards the house once down on the walk.  
  
"You know what? That's fine. Screw you, too!" He turned around, slumping and then picked up a rock and threw it successfully and some paneling. "DAMN YOU, KAT!"  
  
He jumped in his car and drove off with more sound and speed than strictly necessary. Damn that girl.  
  
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Note: Enjoyed it? Hated it? Let me know; just realize that flamers will be publicly humiliated IF I decide to continue this. THAT, however, will require plenty on positive reviews. 


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